A week into semi-retirement and a few things have become apparent. First, I don’t regret waiting until May and I really thought I would. Somehow – and it totally baffles the imagination – I appear to have done this at just the right time for both me and my little family. Secondly, there is a twinge of sadness in my semi-retirement that Darryl isn’t along for the ride with me. I see how hard he works and the fact that due to renovations, life isn’t any easier for him with me working less. So, I still wish it was more him semi-retired than me. He’s our strongest player at home but we need to figure out a way to use him more sparingly so he can have a life, too. And finally, I have realized that while I thought it was going to take 4-6 weeks for me to get my act together, it really only took a week for me to whip this house into somewhat decent shape and I probably need one more week to get caught up on a few other things. That last realization is somewhat astounding, given how cluttered we had allowed the house to become.
It’s Memorial Day weekend around here and while we’re still not to the point of living life in the slow lane, I can see glimpses of it in our future. Yes, we still have 80% of the garden to plant and at least four major renovations to complete. There’s also the compost pile to fix, the constant yard work and a plethora of home/family activities to accomplish. But truly? Yes, there are glimpses of a new life. Next week will be the true test of our new life. All of the things I have been preparing for and practicing finally “go live” in the first true routine week. Next week, the new chapter begins.
Since December, I’ve been trying to envision what that new chapter will look like. It’s a bit like summer mornings here in Western New York. Mornings can be overcast and gray, the result of the heavy layer of fog that expands from the river channel just about a mile from our house. Those of us in the valley can enjoy cool, damp mornings which is great for gardening but not as good for a cup of coffee on the back deck. But, as the fog burns off, the realism comes true: a morning with dense, heavy fog often turns into a brilliantly blue-skied, warm, and low-humidity day. So, since December I’ve been in the fog. Hoping that the future would be what I had dreamed about and feeling a somewhat cautious sense of confidence that just as I know what the fog will burn off to, so can I be confident about what my new life will look like. I have planned it so carefully that there really was little left to chance.
And now? Well, it’s here and yes, things are about to get good in our world. The week ahead beckons in a way that it hasn’t for a long time. It stretches out with the opportunity to get the lawn into as good of shape as the house, to pick out a book to read, to catch up on line-dried laundry and to make a few new recipes. As I think about the possibilities, it dawns on me that next week isn’t a vacation week and in instead is a representation of our new life. Honestly? It’s a life I’ve been trying to live but haven’t quite mastered yet.
Since spring, I’ve been trying to demonstrate to both Darryl and myself what our new future would look like. I took over mowing and most of the trimming to give Darryl a break and let him focus on the garden and the dregs of renovation. I’ve been attempting to cook healthy, well-prepared meals each night and keeping the whole “meal prep” gig organized. After cleaning up from renovations, I’ve been trying – somewhat unsuccessfully – to keep a lid on the house. While doing all of this, I was also working extra hours so that I could start my half-time gig a full five weeks earlier than my official step-down date. So, the past several weeks have wobbled wildly from feeling like I’ve got things together to them reeling back out of control again. Again, like wandering around in dense fog. I could somewhat see the promise of the future but hadn’t yet realized it.
Today, the fog begins to lift and by Wednesday, I can expect that brilliantly blue sky. After our company leaves on Tuesday, we go back to the house just being Darryl, me and the furry ones. The pressure to finish the bathroom will be off. The pressure to plant the garden will be on, but that’s just a typical June event for us. And all of the things I’ve been dreaming about? Well, that’s on, too.
My life in the slow lane is going to be pretty simple. Good, home-cooked, from-scratch healthy meals for dinner. A clean refrigerator stocked with healthy and nutritious food. A clean house with made beds using sheets that were dried on the clothesline. Happy furry ones with extra momma loving. Weekend hikes mixed with weekend projects so that we achieve some balance in our life. Summer campfires and stargazing. Home-made iced tea using real lemons and sun-brewed tea. Home canning. Fall pumpkin carving along with a fall half-marathon. A simple, quiet Christmas at home with family, books and kitties. Simplicity abounds and it all starts now.
Of course, it will never be the case of simply laying back, eating bonbons and watching the moon chase the sun day after day. Instead, we have exactly 69 tomato plants started and we are giving my sister seven plants. That leaves 62 for our garden. We’ve got 51 sweet potato plants and we will be giving away 20. Amongst all varieties, we have 48 pepper plants. Carrots, beets, beans and dill are directly seeded. We also have celery and basil ready to plant. The thyme and oregano come up on their own. We already have three rows of regular potatoes planted, growing alongside 200 onions and 52 garlic plants. Once the garden is planted, it does get easier – our job is to watch it grow, weeding periodically and watering when necessary.
Inside, we have just a few more renovation projects until we can declare our house “done”. The bathroom will be the first finished. Then, the guest and Darryl’s office ceilings. Upstairs floors and then finally trim. After that, we can simply enjoy a house designed for us by us. The pantry that I now couldn’t live without, the recycling closet which has made a world of difference, the open floor plan that makes room for my dining table to comfortably seat 12 and the wide, easy stairs which no longer requires tall people to duck as they ascend. Yep, we can certainly settle in here.
All in all, life today is not dissimilar to the last few minutes before the fog burns off. I can see the future now. Yes, it’s going to get busy sometimes. Yes, I will have to keep my “high gear” somewhat functional so I can still shift into it when necessary. But on the whole, life is now moving to the slow lane.
As I make this shift, I am so mindful that every step – every meal prepared, every blade of grass cut, every item of clothing hung out in the line – needs to be done with gratitude. I am grateful for the opportunity that few have to slow down at 53. I am also grateful to that girl who worked whatever hours were available to work and saved with a goal of living 20% under her means. That sacrifice – which many times felt like too much – is paying off. I am grateful for my husband who took on this amazing opportunity that afforded me this chance years earlier than I could have done it on my own. I am grateful to my mom and grandmother for instilling in me the love of hanging clothes and preserving food. I am grateful to my dad for passing on his love of the great outdoors and summer campfires. I am grateful for the furry ones insisting that they become our pets as they bring so much joy. I started my journey towards simple peace with the decision to quit my job as a CEO and take a work-from-home consulting job. I had to work to rebuild the pieces of me that I forgot about, having focused so much on work for most of my adult life. And finally, I moved to true part-time just one week ago. It has been a tremendous journey. I am now looking forward to understanding what the routine of part-time will look like. But most importantly, I’ve taken another giant leap towards simple peace. That is what is has always been about.
The Yuppie Homesteader 