I have to admit it: the holiday season has felt a little bit like a bust this year. I’ve been a little focused on the post-mortem of why and haven’t really focused as much on how to reel it back in. Honestly? It’s not even December for another 16 hours. I could potentially make it a joyous season.
But first, I have to get this off of my chest. Maybe writing it will finally stopping it from rolling around in my head everyday. It’s time to discuss WHY this year feels like a bust.
The primary reason: it was way too much travel. Two personal trips and three work trips over a span of six weeks just throws me off of my game. As much as I love my husband and know that he does try, without me home our house just doesn’t run the way its supposed to. And even though I was only gone for a few days each time, the fact is that it takes me at least a week to pull everything – including myself – back into order when I travel. So, I literally went six weeks without really feeling like I got space from travel and then travel cleanup. On the heels of that, I threw Thanksgiving the week after I got home from my last trip and we are leaving before Christmas to go to New Orleans, which means another trip and another set of chaos.
Then, there’s not being home on Christmas. I love my in-laws and always want them to have their fair share of holidays but not being home at Christmas is hard on our little family. Besides needing pet care during the winter months when roads can be unpredictable, not being in one’s own home at the holidays is tough. Outside of those factors, Darryl has been incredibly busy at work as well and we have squeaked in a weekend project or two that has made life feel a little extra unsettled. It just doesn’t feel like he can ever unplug from work and relax in the evening the way we used to do at the holidays, which keeps me keyed up as well.
And finally, Darryl has asked that we lay out the flooring boards for our second floor in the dining room prior to leaving for New Orleans. His point: the boards can acclimate and we can have them well-organized for our post-Christmas/few-days-off floor laying extravaganza. It makes sense but it doesn’t sit well with me. I genuinely live for the six weeks between the middle of November and the end of December when my house is as clean, calm and as decorated as its ever going to be. The decorations are my visual cue that life is intended to slow down and it’s okay to shut out the world. Laying a few hundred pounds of loose hardwood floorboards into the middle of those decorations kinda puts a damper on it. (Although to be honest, I’ll probably put away most of the decorations if we have construction materials out.)
So that’s why Christmas feels like a bust. I honestly can’t get motivated to finish my Christmas shopping (it will take only a couple of hours anyway) and I’ve already written off the idea of sending Christmas cards.
That begs the question, then: what would it take – in the now 15 hours and 40 minutes until December 1st – for me to turn it around? Hmm… .
For starters, today is the last hard day of work before I hit the December slide. While it doesn’t help for today, it may help tomorrow to be able to think less regarding work and more about home. So, that is an environmental change which will make a difference. But, I get it. The change has to come from within me. Honestly, Darryl is too busy to lead the change and the cats are worthless when it comes to planning family fun. So, how do I turn this around?
I’m struggling; I’ll be honest. I just want to magically get in the spirit and not feel like I’ve lost too much time when it already feels like I’ve lost two of my six weeks and I’ll lose another two weeks at the end of the month. I’ve only got these two weeks to make it fab. Still, I’m not one to give up on enjoying my holidays, if I can. And deep down, I know the trick: it’s about creating moments. If I work to create fun family moments, I also enjoy the planning and both Darryl and I (and sometimes the cats) can equally enjoy the fun. So, rather than our typical evening of quick showers, fix dinner, feed the cats and sit on the couch watching TV, it’s time for me to start creating moments.
And in the past, we’ve had some great ones. So, if the holidays are really all about celebrating one’s traditions, then here are a few I can work to recreate:
- Decorate-Your-Cat Night: this is a fun family tradition whereby Darryl and I make margaritas from scratch and then attempt to put a pet Santa Claus hat and beard on each cat. The margarita gives us courage. The snacks for kitties afterwards re-establishes peace in the northeast.
- A Walk in the Woods: one of my favorite escape places is our local state park. Its where my sisters and I cross country ski and my husband and I have taken many holiday hikes. In particular just being out in nature and away from our phones and the pull of the outside world makes for a relaxing time and good conversation.
- Break Out the Recipe Books: we have a collection of recipe books around here – from some New Orleans favorites to some healthy cookbooks to The Sioux Chef cookbook. It’s always a fun time when we plan on doing a recipe from that book together. I make sure we have all of the ingredients and then Darryl and I put on a little music and cook together.
- Dinner and a Movie: way back when we were first dating and married, we always went to the movies during the holidays. Our movie theater now has these awesome heated reclining seats. Back in the old days, we also had a quick bite out before we went to the movies. Seems like as good of time as any to recreate that little tradition.
- Ice Skating Night: my sisters live by a really spectacular ice arena that has in the past played host to the US Junior National Skating Championships. They have open skating times several times throughout the holiday season and ice skating plus rentals are pretty cheap. It would be a great family day/night to do skating and then dinner at the local brewery.
- Game or Puzzle Night: this is always a fun activity, but lately I’ve been too keyed up to relax into either. Perhaps this weekend, once I get cleaned up and finally ahead on everything, I can slip into that zone and we can plan a game night one night next week.
- Home Dinner and a Movie: a modified take on the “Dinner and a Movie,” this is the home version. It will typically start with A Charlie Brown Christmas, my favorite Christmas movie of all time, and some homemade popcorn. Then, we tend to like a good documentary on an interesting topic. In the past, we have watched, “Eat, Race, Win,” “Neat” and “Somm.” I’m sure there’s a good one out there for us to queue up for a home dinner and movie night. As for dinner? Well, it’s almost irrelevant in this scenario. Instead, it’s more important that dinner be early so that the peeps in this household are ready for popcorn when Charlie Brown comes on.
And just like that, I have amazingly slipped back into holiday mode. There are a few other things we can do: a great homemade breakfast together on Sunday morning, taking in a fabulous romantic dinner in New Orleans, doing a “campfire” dinner indoors by the fireplace or having an outdoor fire complete with blankets and coats. But, we can make this happen. In the end, life is always about moments over minutes. As much as I sometimes get too much in my own head, it’s good to think I can draw on times past as a blueprint for the current celebrations.
Happy Holidays, y’all. (But don’t look for a Christmas card. I have truly written it off for this year.)
The Yuppie Homesteader 