All things warm and wonderful.

When it gets crazy, the crazy get… better focus?

After a somewhat bumpy January when I let the stress and demands of others – mainly work – begin to erode my sense of simple peace, it’s now February and my head is back where it belongs. And now that I’m back here, I am once again reminded of why this is so important to me.

For both of us, life centers around home. We both work from home, which helps, but we also spent a lot of time – into our 40s – being single. So, a life that is focused on family and home is restoring, in a way. We are able to enjoy some of the simple pleasures of being a family unit, with our four furry ones in tow. Things like cooking together or working on a renovation project together are actually pretty sweet. Life at home works for us.

But individually, life at home has deeper meaning for me. As a recovering CEO, I am constantly amazed by what life at home means to me. First, there is my daily routine. Seven years ago, I stopped using an alarm clock. That may not seem like much but it was huge for my life. The shift was immense: I went from a time-driven life where time was my scarcest resource to a life that actually allowed me and my body to wake up when I was actually rested.

Over the years, the changes from my old life to new life have become more and more routine. Time continues to become less scarce and I find myself more often making decisions about how I use my time with our lives – and not my job – as the primary focus. Mostly, I see myself differently. For the first couple of years, it felt like cheating when I went to the store at two in the afternoon. These days, I don’t even notice it. My true identity has shifted: I’m mostly a homemaker and I work part-time.

Now, as we finish the renovations upstairs, I’m ready to take one more noticeable step towards a home-centered life and away from work: I’m turning my office back into a guest room (with a desk in it for my office use). The step is largely a practical one – the room is underutilized as an office and this would give it a second purpose. Still, the enthusiasm I am bringing to this particular effort isn’t lost on me: it’s one more act of me reclaiming real life over work life.

It occurs to me as I’ve started getting the pieces of the spare room together that I am doing this more thoughtfully than I would have approached it had I done this even a few years ago. Form is really following function this time. I’m focused on little things that will pay big dividends: a dresser that will allow me to store the opposite season’s linens easily; risers on the bed that allows little furry ones their own “quiet” space to tuck away and sleep on a warm fuzzy blanket of their own; sturdy nightstands and lamps which can handle “kitty curiosity” as well as provide a landing spot for a book or two; a summery quilt for a quick afternoon nap, when it’s called for; a wintry set of linens which will keep the sleeper warm and cozy on a February night, if needed.

Mostly, the escape I get from focusing on how to make that spare bedroom a calm respite is telling: I am ready to once again minimize the pursuit of all things corporate for all things warm and wonderful. Each time I think I can’t slow life down anymore or focus any better on the things that matter to me, I find myself amazed to discover that I can. January, for all of its ugliness, made me believe that despite everything I had done to live a family-focused life work would always intrude. But in February, I am seeing that once again, I can stop those thoughts and, if needed, make additional changes in the pursuit of peace.

It is both empowering and sometimes daunting to realize that life can truly be what you make it. From time to time, I will still need to pull myself up short and realize I have fallen back into those bad habits that had me focused solely on work. And yet, time and time again, I have proved I can do exactly that over the past seven years.

Excuse me. It’s time to rejoin my real life… in progress.