It has been a fabulous four-day weekend for me. The weather until today has been absolutely fabulous for a solid week. The garden is largely in – just direct seeding left – and I’ve managed to keep enough of a lid on home, garden and yard that we are going into tomorrow – the first day of the workweek – with not a lot of ground lost. I hung out with my sisters this weekend, did a fabulous bike ride around the local state park and generally embraced the good times offered.
This weekend also marks 10 weeks since I essentially quit my job and began working for myself. Maybe that’s why I re-evaluated my life. Up until now, I’ve been so focused on renovations and the garden that the spare time created by me not working as much was absorbed by the entirety of home needs. Now, as we turn the corner into June, it strikes me that this is what I planned for all along: leave in March, fully transition by the end of May and get renos to a place where it and the garden have been largely taken care of. Then, enjoy summer.
That’s the re-evaluation: enjoy summer. And not just for me, but for those I love especially my husband, but including our families and the furry ones who call this place their lair.
When you ask yourself, “what was it all for?” this is the answer. Just as we enter the best two seasons and the best seven months of the year, it was all for this. Not just summer but time for good times.
As I sit back today and look around, I realize: we did it. And “it” means a lot of things. We weathered scary health diagnoses, a whole house-gut-job, two demanding careers, the adoption of pets, the re-landscaping of our huge yard post geothermal and solar installations… . the list could go on. But that’s done now. We are here. And the glory of that is life can be completely different now. And while it can’t be completely different for Darryl, I can make it different enough for both of us in ways we have never enjoyed before. This weekend was a classic example.
We got great garden work done this weekend and with me helping for the first year (I used to be too afraid of garter snakes to help), we amplified the amount of work we can get done. Currently, everything that is in the ground has been well-cared for and is doing well as a result. We also had a great campfire last night and the night before, we enjoyed a movie and some fabulous takeout. Simple pleasures but the kind of pleasures that make life feel a bit easy breezy.
As we now move forward, there are two additional holidays in the next six weeks, giving us additional time off to relax outside of the weekends. But even more, there’s a whole summer ahead of us with campfires, star gazing, walks in the sunshine or hiking in the woods, bike rides together and playing with our furry ones, the remaining two of which are learning to go outside. Once we slide into fall, there is harvesting and apple picking to be enjoyed, even more campfires and the coziness of movie nights with homemade popcorn. I won’t even get into the holidays because I will end up devoting pages and pages of this blog to the holidays once those arrive.
My point? Life no longer is about what needs to be done or achieved or completed. Life isn’t any longer about the scoreboard. Instead? Life is about living. Life is about the simple things like enjoying a meal together, double-checking the garden to make sure it’s doing okay, giving each one of the furry ones one-on-one time, spending time with family and friends. Life for me is also about spending time with my sisters and our family as well as my besties. Life is about reading a book or taking an afternoon nap, just because.
Life has changed since March 14th and while I knew it would, I didn’t necessarily fully adjust my perception about life. I was still highly focused on achievement and responsibilities. I had been so focused on “catching up” on home and yard management after years of being focused on my career that I was switching out one set of stress-inducing achievement scorecards for another set. Until this weekend. All along, this weekend was the date in my head when I said I would be done with “catchup” and be on to new life. On Friday, I was prepared to declare that I wasn’t quite done yet and couldn’t yet turn that corner. Today? I realize it’s a choice. I can always suds myself up into a frenzy about a collection of small tasks to be done.
… or I could create peace. And not just any peace, but simple peace. And not just for me but for my entire little family. Darryl said as much the other day when he said he was no longer feeling overwhelmed.
Hmm…
In retrospect, I think this is one time when the realization hit just as the moment hit. I couldn’t have had this revelation any sooner than this weekend, honestly. I did need those ten weeks – not just to do the catchup I was so focused on but to also let my heart and soul settle into a new way of life. But now? I’m here. And this family is going nowhere else.
The Yuppie Homesteader 