I have the next four days off. And by “off”, I mean “look at your email only occasionally.” (Hi, my name is Gail. I’m a workaholic and a responsibility junkie.) Yep, I admit it, I’m just a little bit obsessive about email and work. But, for four days, I need to let work go and – for the first time in a long time – not replace work work with home work. Instead, my goal with this time is to certainly do some of the routine stuff I do around here along with maybe a small project or two. But the rest of the time? I gotta be me. No, that isn’t working. Instead, I also have to figure out who me is when she’s not working.
And that got me thinking… what is life like for these four days or in these next four months? If I can envision those, what will life look like in four years? Now, considering that I’m only on my first cup of coffee, that is some serious envisioning that I’m asking myself to do. Yet, in the end, is it really that hard? I mean, for goodness’ sake, is our life so much of a crap shoot that we can’t figure out what the next four months will look like?
Deciding that no, my life isn’t such a crap shoot and because I’m currently the only human heartbeat in this house awake, it’s time to do some serious visioning. We’ll start with the easy part.
For the next four days, the weather is going to be largely crappy with rain, overcast skies and slightly warmer but not yet warm temperatures. (Think 60s.) Since our late spring/early summer activities are focused on outdoor work, that does limit what the weekend can look like. In my case? I really do hope to get my perennial gardens weeded and re-mulched, although the mulch may be a stretch. I’d also like to get a run in, which I’m suddenly enjoying running again. Finally, I ordered two summer books from my favorite author. I’m a buy-the-book, turn-the-page and lose-myself kind of reader, when I actually make the time to read. The books arrive in two days. I think I’ll read a book. And somewhere between making my gardens beautiful again, running and reading a book for fun, I think I’ll locate the remaining vestiges of me that I’ve long forgotten. It will be that girl who daydreams, who enjoys creating something and who doesn’t have to be in such a hurry to tick something off her list.
Alright, we’ve got the next four days licked. What does the next four months look like? Stating the obvious, the next four months are the best four months of the year. They are the ones I live for in the depths of winter. June and July are a celebration of all things new, bright and beautiful. August and September are a celebration of plenty, when the garden’s bounty comes in and the world typically takes one big long sigh before going back to work in October. As any reader of this blog will know, once we hit the autumn months, I start celebrating the entire season from fall through Christmas and New Year’s with an abandonment that is slightly unseemly for a 50-year-old. Too bad. I love the season and particularly the holidays. I am literally standing on the cusp of the seven greatest months of the year and the next four feature the best weather.
So then, not to lose focus, but what does the next four months look like? For us, it does include some work. We need to replace our back deck, but it’s not (and it never is) as simple as that. To replace said back deck, we need to tear off the old deck, regrade some of the yard, move the outdoor spigot, remove and get rid of everything on the existing deck and… . You get the picture. It’s one of our projects. We just don’t replace. We strip it back to its bare bones and start all over, correcting any previous mistakes that were made. The end product will be fabulous, but there is a lot of work between here and there.
In the meantime, I’m also getting my first grand nephew this summer, I’m helping my niece to plan her own garden and running another 10K. So, with what is already sounding like an incredibly busy summer to me, what else could I fit in?
Well, my bestie is coming in June for a week and I’m excited to hang out with her. We plan to take some day trips and have some campfires, amongst other things. Nothing big, mind you. But enough to remember who we really are. I’m also looking forward to the simple things: campfires, time spent at the lake, harvesting our garden, picking strawberries, then cherries, then blueberries and then blackberries. I want to try some new recipes, celebrate our anniversary with a sailboat cruise and a trip to the planetarium and maybe, just maybe, find some time to write – if not finish – my book. Again, it sounds like a lot, but if I get at least half of the above in, I’ll be happy.
Now, to the hard part. Excuse me while I feed my kitties their morning snack so our little girl can get her medicine. Envisioning the next four years is going to take some time and I need to clear the decks to focus.
Okay, I’m back.
Four years, huh? Well, let’s start with the easy stuff. In four years, it would be great if both my husband and I were semi-retired. Now, I know, I know: that’s not directly about me since I already am semi-retired. But here’s the good part of him also being semi-retired: we can share the load a little more equally around here and we should both have more free time. Right now, our engines run hot, even with me semi-retired. Home and yard routine maintenance is nearly a half-time job. Our special projects including the above-mentioned deck, are also half-time jobs while they’re ongoing (or quarter-time jobs that take twice as long). My hubby’s job is a little more than full-time and lately, I’ve been working a little more than half-time. Do the math and it’s easy to see: we are maxed out.
In four years, I’d also like the renovations to be over, possibly even including our main bathroom. (Honestly, if we were both semi-retired, I think we’d enjoy the project of doing the bathroom; as it is now, it’s just a burden.) In four years, I also want to have my garage and my paved driveway. It snows – sometimes a lot – and I’m sick of shoveling and cleaning off my vehicle.
Okay, but what about me? Damn. It’s hard to get down to the real stuff. Okay, let’s see… .
In four years, I hope I’m still running. I actually enjoy it and it’s so good for me. As an inhaler-dependent asthmatic, those 3-4 miles I pound the pavement forces my lungs to push through air and builds a stronger heart for when my lungs get all funky, like they do. In four years, I’d also like to do a regular winter vacation somewhere warm. That will both give me something to look forward to and an escape from the cold, dark days of winter. I enjoy the creativity of the planning of such trips and I hope that I have the time to relax and immerse myself. Finally, in four years, I hope I can preserve my sense of self for longer and longer periods of time. I need considerable down time to preserve my sense of self. That’s time to read a book, daydream, try new things, get creative, take a nap and refresh, go for a run… all of those things. They calm my overreactive personality down. In four years, I’m hopefully enjoying semi-retirement with my husband and my sisters (and their husbands). We’re hopefully watching the new generation raise their kids and make their marks professionally while telling tired old stories of our own glory days.
Hmm… what it comes down to? I hope in four years that life truly has slowed to a manageable pace and that we have completed all of those tasks we put on our plates now so that we can enjoy where we are when we get there. But most of all? I hope I learn to appreciate this life and stop looking for the work to do.
The Yuppie Homesteader 