I haven’t posted in awhile, but that’s not because I haven’t been writing. I have. You wouldn’t have wanted to read it. What I wrote about was full-on anxiety about our deck building project. Like I always do, I painfully wrote out each anxiety, thought, plan or concern. It’s cathartic for me, but painful to read.
So, what happened? Why am I posting again? Well, this past weekend we were able to finish 50% of our footings that we need to put in. (Technically, we did 20%, which got us up to 50%, but you get the drift.) And just like that, the deck project became doable. Hard, but doable.
With the deck doable, I can also do the one thing I couldn’t do before: look beyond the chest-high waters of the deck project and see that there is life still out there. It took awhile, but I’m finally there.
Now, I’ll be honest, the rest of August is going to be focused on the foundations. We literally have to dig a four-foot hole in the ground, fill it back in slightly with gravel, place a 42-inch pier into the hole using our yuppie backhoe and then refill the hole. The project is only made more difficult by a terrain that alternates between huge rocks, river rock and veins of clay. But getting to 50% this weekend means we can get to 80% next week and 100% the following weekend. Yes, we still have to dig and pour concrete footers for the stair landing pad, but we will have to frame the deck first. And after these piers, the landing pad will be easy(ish).
And that gets me to perspective. Back in June, we made a deal: build the deck and be done with home renovations for a year. When we first started digging foundations, I couldn’t even imagine being done with the deck and I stopped myself from looking forward. No sense wanting what I didn’t think I could have. Now? I’m already picturing the first margarita on the deck. Maybe more importantly, I’m picturing life after renovations.
All in all, this was always probably set up to be our summer of discontent. Let’s be honest here: replacing a massive 32X10 deck was not for the faint of heart. Plus, we wanted to essentially clear the decks of other “to dos” before we started the deck. No sense getting into it and feeling like you have to stop to take care of some other emergency somewhere else. So, we took care of firewood, cleaned up the shed and tractor garage, built a catio, replaced our mailbox and had the front yard re-landscaped first. Therefore, we didn’t necessarily pull the first nail off the old deck with fresh spirits. We already had a little fatigue. But now that we hit the 50% mark on the hardest part? I’ve got my second wind, baby, and I’m about to focus on what comes next.
As we finish the deck, we’ll also make that right-hand turn into fall and as even a super casual reader of this blog knows, I love fall. I’m already in the mood for pumpkin spice cake with a vanilla buttercream frosting and a nice hot apple cider. I want to dig out the jeans and sweaters, watch some football games and carve pumpkins. To think that we will button up the deck, the garden and taking care of the leaves at just about the same time no longer feels overwhelming. Instead, I look forward to the week of Halloween. Everything should be well done by then and then we can slip into our year without a renovation a little early – and just in time to enjoy the holidays. Again, there will be nothing better.
Had I known then what I know now about the totality of the deck project, I’m not sure I would have shown any inclination to start it. So, I’m glad I didn’t know, honestly. But now that it feels safe to visualize the end? Well, I’m all in. And let’s face it, I’m going to love it when it’s done. Moreover, I’m going to love that we get a year off. That will be amazing.
Sometimes, it seems, its better to not know what you’re about to take on. And when you get there and it seems like it’s way too much? Well, just put your head down and power through. But when you finally see the glimmer of hope – as small as it may be – grab onto it. And finally, when you get the chance – the real chance – to shut it all down and simply just enjoy what you’ve already achieved? Take it with a heart full of gratitude. We’ve got about two more months left on this deck but my heart is getting ready for a year’s worth of simple living.
The Yuppie Homesteader 