Getting prepared?

I have this theory that post-retirement life is going to be one big vacation. Evidently, I’m not alone as a quick internet search proves that is the prevailing theory. Then, there is reality. Again, evidently, there are many “phases” to retirement and some aren’t the glorious “vacation” phase I’m looking forward to.

Huh?

Yep, as I do my own prep work for retirement, I’m learning more and more about what it’s really like. According to my online resources (she says in that “according to my sources” tone of voice… 😊), that vacation-all-the-time phase only lasts about a year to 18 months. As I said when my husband proposed, “Really?” Except when he proposed, my “really?” was full of excitement and joy; this time, it’s full of slight disappointment. But then, I disagree. There’s truly a big part of me that says to thoe so-called sources, “Hold my beer.” I plan on stretching that vacation phase out for years.

Yet, while I want to be disdainful of this idea that retirement isn’t going to simply be one long vacation with Friday night margaritas, sleeping in on Monday and going for long afternoon bike rides, I know I also need to think about what it will really be like for me. My so-called experts say I’ll go through a period of loss, where I’ll face potential depression over a lost sense of purpose. For someone who has spent most of her life overdosing on responsibility, I’m convinced that I’ll find complete joy in having none. But maybe I should heed that advice just a little more? Maybe I will want some grand purpose in my life again. I do know that I thoroughly love the idea of being a homemaker and I watched my mom enjoy homemaking throughout her own retirement years. Maybe, just maybe, that will be enough for me?

Then, there is a period of exploration – where I want to learn what else I may be good at – and finally a period of regaining purpose through volunteer work or in some way giving back. Okay, I can see that, too. Both of those sound like desirable phases, although I’d still like to hang out in that honeymoon-vacation phase forever.

Now I get it. I think we all tend to focus a lot on the honeymoon phase. Let’s face it, we get to retirement a little worn out, beaten up and strung out from a career filled with triumphs and losses, achievements and failures, long days, old coffee, greasy lunches and promising yourself those late nights are over. I often envision those last days at work similarly to those last steps of a long run. I cross the tape, put my hands on my hips and almost immediately stop running.

Now that retirement is inching every so much closer, I realize I need to get more serious. Just like the end of renovations didn’t involve a miraculously clean house and hours on end to read books and decorate my house, retirement is going to be both more and less than what I expect. It is time, methinks, to get beyond the honeymoon phase and think about what life looks like when I’m not punching a clock.

That’s where the planning comes in. Lately, we’ve been seriously fixated on the money-saving part of retirement. Our initial plan includes living for at least two years on saved cash and a very small drawdown from retirement. Because we will retire before turning 65, we essentially need to bridge those years until we can take retirement and use Social Security to help fund our cause. Alrighty, that’s the practical, no-nonsense part that we are used to. At the same time, we have both been focused on that honeymoon phase. A little travel, a lot of lazy mornings with coffee on the back deck, the last of our renovation projects and staying in good shape with bike rides, runs, long walks and other healthy activities.

Now, we need to get on to the harder parts. First, I have to admit that I still don’t think we will get bored, depressed or otherwise. Candidly, we are both so busy all of the time with our life outside of work, that I can’t imagine it would ever feel like we lacked purpose. For my hubby, I can see him expanding the garden, working on firewood so it’s not an October crisis, training for Ironmans and other such endurance events and getting back to some of the pastimes he used to love like brewing beer and playing guitar.

For me, as I note above, I love being a homemaker. When I first went part-time and was able to focus on the other side of myself that was not all about spreadsheets, strategic planning and establishing Key Performance Indicators (KPIs), I settled in easily to the woman who enjoyed canning, decorating and making home a soft place to land. And let’s face it, I can easily find 1-2 hours of housework a day around here between kitty care, meal prep, grocery runs and cleaning. (Yes, I am a bit of a neat freak.) Other than that, I’m looking forward to writing more, refinishing furniture (I know, random right?), building out my perennial gardens, getting exercise in each season and traveling a bit.

Mostly, though, I’ve come to some clarity about what retirement symbolizes for me: a narrowed focus to life. These days, I split my life and my headspaces into so many small pieces that it’s difficult to focus or gain any true traction or sustained peace. If I’m not thinking about work, the next project, business development, etc., then I’m thinking about home, family or some other task to be done. When I get rid of work, I chunk off a whole set of headspaces per day. That gives me – finally! – the time to actually slow down and just think. Imagine that?!

This blog started as a series of what I like to call “right turns”. It was a right-turn off the expressway of an executive career into town and a right-turn off of Main Street as a busy employed consultant to my own microbusiness – i.e. my own “neighborhood”. Finally, it was a right turn onto my street with completed renovations. That last right turn? Into my own driveway where I can turn off the engine and enjoy the fruits of retirement.

I know that there are many months still between here and there. But as we slowly get financially ready, I also slowly get physically and emotionally ready.