Every morning, I have this little routine: get up, greet the furry ones, make the bed, do a little morning yoga, make coffee, scoop boxes, grab that first cup of coffee and eventually sit to journal. In total, it takes about 20-25 minutes to get to that first cup of coffee. When I do? The day’s first pause begins. I have made it a deliberate point to enjoy that first cup without any distractions. No computer, no phone and no kitty shenanigans. Just me and a few thoughts.
For the second cup, I open my computer and journal. I’m on my second cup.
One month into retirement and I have to say, this is pretty nice. I’m still busy and still working a little bit – about two hours a day, four days a week. It’s just about the right amount. Limiting my workday allows me to limit my work headspaces per day, which I found rather stressful. These days, it’s just 1-2 projects per day. On the home front, that also allows me to expand my headspaces. Typically, I can take care of the routine and possibly squeeze in an extra project or two. It’s not much but it keeps us a little ahead of the game.
My newfound realization, though? A chance for downtime. I have to admit, I didn’t even know it existed anymore. Still, every day I make time for downtime. Whether its going for a three-mile walk, working a jigsaw puzzle, reading a book or – let’s get real here – doomscrolling the Pottery Barn and Pinterest decorating pages, it’s my time. As a result? I feel a little more human.
As far as transitions go, a September transition from working to retirement wasn’t necessarily the smoothest, due mostly to two trips I managed to squeeze in during September. The trips were fabulous and everything my heart needed, but it didn’t give my brain time to slow down. In October, I face two work trips: one a day trip to NY and the other a three-day stand in Maine. In November, we will travel again for Thanksgiving. Where does that leaves me? Hmmm… it’s going to be December before I can think about winding down and testing out what real retirement looks and feels like.
Yet, in all of my early morning journaling and ruminating, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s perfectly fine for me to simply relax and enjoy as much of the downtime as I get, regardless of work or travel commitments. Honestly? That’s a huge shift for me. At my heart, I am a “clear the decks, then enjoy” kind of girl. Normally, I simply wouldn’t allow myself to think about retirement or downtime or cleared headspaces until at least the October trips were over. But something inside me has shifted a bit. I now see the travel and work as aberrations to my retired life. They are no longer a continuation of my career.
As much as that may sound like simple mental gymnastics, it’s actually not self-manufactured. My responsibility junkie mind would never have let me take the leaps that this type of realization required. Instead, I had to start feeling it to believe it and candidly, I didn’t even know the shift was happening until I had enough time to realize it was. I’m different all the way around. In work conversations, I see myself as a little apart from colleagues, who are still climbing professional ladders and want to discuss business development. I’m a little more like, “Well, if you need me, go ahead and call. I am trying to wind down, but I enjoy working with you.” At home, I tend to prioritize what I need to get done that day for our lives and then squeeze in work around it.
Now, I’ll be honest here. Outside of my morning rituals, the rest is not completely routine yet. I’m in that awkward stage – a bit like transitioning from a kid to a teenager. I’m all legs, arms, and painful lack of coordination sometimes. Then, other days, life runs incredibly smoothly and I declare that I’ve finally “got it”. But even acknowledging my awkwardness, I’m no longer stressed by it. Instead, I simply accept it and move on. I’ll get there eventually.
And in the meantime? Hmm… I guess I’ll enjoy another cup of coffee.
